Forum:Give me money

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Guys, this is totally a bomb!

You guys should give me money! I may be new, but I know what is good, and good is giving me money!

If you refuse my demands of a bulletproof vest, a helicopter, and money, I will detonate the bomb I have rigged under Uncyclopedia! Everyone, except Benson, will perish in an encompassing blast as Uncyclopedia falls to its knees! Fear me! FEAR MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! --Molotovnight 16:19, 6 March 2007 (UTC)

Funny, I just saw that bomb. Though, writing "bomb" on a cardboard box isn't exactly a very convincing bluff... —Major Sir Hinoa prepare for trouble • make it double? 16:22, 6 March 2007 (UTC)

Give him some credit - at least he spelt it right. Good thing too, those BMOBs are really tricky to defuse. -- (but) Untrue  Whhhy?Whut?How? *Back from the dead* 17:15, 6 March 2007 (UTC)

If that was a real bomb, I wouldn't be screaming my head off. Cause i'm a Grue. Bombs 101: bombs cant kill grues.

Lt. High Gen. Grue The Few The Proud, The Marines

Hey, the box has doughnuts and donuts in it! What luck! --The Acceptable  Cainad  (Fnord) 17:54, 6 March 2007 (UTC)

... *Cough cough*... Geez, what is everyone looking at me for? Oh, fine... /me gives Molotovnight $25. -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 06:42, 7 March 2007 (UTC)

THANK YOU. YOU WILL BE SPARED. BUT AS FOR EVERYONE ELSE, THEY SHALL DIE. HAVE A NICE DAY.

--Molotovnight 14:19, 7 March 2007 (UTC)

Then how am I still alive? And the only person allowed to type in all caps is BENSON. --Emmzee 14:22, 7 March 2007 (UTC)

Did I just a splode?--Schizo Master 14:28, 7 March 2007 (UTC)

WHATEVER. YOU GUYS ARE ALL DEAD AND YOU KNOW IT. AND NOW THAT I HAVE $25, I WILL BUY SALVATION FROM BENSON. --Molotovnight 16:15, 7 March 2007 (UTC)

I don't even have enough money to buy spam :( 18:18, 7 March 2007 (UTC)

We do not appreciate being exposed to rapid gas decompression, mortal. Now we must have our sweater dry-cleaned. /Lord Fluffy dusts off his slightly-charred cashmere sweater, glares at Molotovnight. We are taking that twenty five dollars to pay for it. --Lord Fluffy who rains fire from the heavens 18:20, 7 March 2007 (UTC)

Here you go, Fluffy! Oh wait, the point was to take the money back from Molotov, wasn't it? Oops. Well at least we still have the vest and helicopter. Mr. Briggs Inc. 21:59, 7 March 2007 (UTC) Eh?

I AM THE ULTIMATE UNCYCLOPEDIA TERRORIST, AND NOBODY KNOWS WHEN OR WHERE I WILL STRIKE NEXT!

I, MOLOTOVNIGHT, DECLARE MYSELF MIGHTIER THAN BENSON, AND EVERYONE WHO DOUBTS IT IS A HEATHEN AND SHOULD DIE UNDER MY BLADE. THE ONLY WAY TO SURVIVE IS THROUGH MOLOTOVNIGHT, THE SHINING BEACON OF HOPE AND JUSTICE. IF YOU REFUSE TO SUBMIT TO MY DEMANDS, I WILL TAKE SOPHIA HOSTAGE AND POTATOCHOP HER IF YOU DO NOT WORSHIP ME AS A GOD! --Molotovnight 02:39, 8 March 2007 (UTC)

I don't know...how are you better than BENSON? --Emmzee the Furious^{Spam me!} _{Don't click here!}

I only have enough worshipping abilities to worship BENSON. Also, can I add that as another death threat to my counter? --Uncyclon - Do we still link to BENSON? 02:58, 8 March 2007 (UTC)

<---That's a grue military grade all your base bomb that only kill anti-BENSONs. Now, Motolovnight, I kill you, for BENSON! Lt. High Gen. Grue The Few The Proud, The Marines

Heretic! None can be better than BENSON, for BENSON is Better Than You! This threat, puny and monkey-based though it is, shall be our thread, for the glory of that paragon of perfection, that theological wonder, that mighty presence that is BENSON! March to war, my fellows, for HE is better than us, and we are better than Molotovnight!--Symuun 08:14, 8 March 2007 (UTC)

YOU ME-DAMNED FOOLS! IF YOU WON'T WORSHIP ME, NONE OF YOU WILL BE SAVED! NOBODY IS BETTER THAN ME, AND I AM BETTER THAN EVERYBODY! YOU ARE JUST IN FEAR AND AWE OF MY POWER.I DEMAND THAT YOUR SO-CALLED "BENSON" FIGHT ME LIKE THE FAKE GOD THAT HE IS! IF HE REFUSES, I WILL START TO STEAL UNCYCLOPEDIA'S MEGAHERTZ! NOW WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THAT? --Molotovnight 13:48, 8 March 2007 (UTC)

I say you're nuts. --Emmzee the Furious^{Spam me!} _{Don't click here!}

'Die under your blade'? I think not. BENSON, I'll take this one if you don't mind. It seems to me that any person or diety of even moderate intelligence would be able to see that assaulting a religion or followers of a religion in their own place of worship is sheer stupidity. This is just as a peer diety. However, on a more personal note, it seems to me that you must be a very low-grade entity if you require a bomb, helicopter, and bulletproof vest- and not only that, but demand it as charity! I, a self-respecting power, would merely smite the infidels. Or at the most create the items I require myself. In conclusion, YOU GOT PWNED. --Lord Fluffy who rains fire from the heavens 17:53, 8 March 2007 (UTC)

My Anti Anti-Benson bomb will explode in 5, 4, 3, 2,1...

Ha! Bigger asposion than yours! Wait, Motolov, your dead. BENSON wins! Also, it doesn't harm cashmere sweaters!

Uncyclopedia:1,000 
Benson:infinity 
Motolov:0   

Lt. High Gen. Grue The Few The Proud, The Marines

I THINK NOT! SORRY TO BURST YOUR BUBBLE, BUT YOU CANNOT KILL A GOD! I ONLY NEED A HELICOPTER SO I CAN BETTER TRANSPORT MY TRUE FOLLOWERS TO THE MOUNTAIN OF PWNAGE SO WE CAN LAUGH AT YOU BENSONITES BURN IN THE FIRES OF ETERNAL HELL! YOU ARE MISTAKEN, "HIGH GENERAL GRUE", IF THAT IS YOUR REAL NAME, YOU CANNOT KILL ME, ONLY KILL YOURSELF. --Molotovnight 02:19, 9 March 2007 (UTC)

What part of "Bombs don't kill grues" and "The bomb only kills anti-BENSONS do you not understand. Thats it. Bigger Anti Anti-BENSON whose name is Motolovnight bomb.

Lt. High Gen. Grue The Few The Proud, The Marines P.S. You want this? <Waves 100 dollar bill in the air>

Please, no negotiating with Uncyclopedia's biggest infidel and terrorist! You might give him ideas! --Emmzee the Furious^{Spam me!} _{Don't click here!}

The cows say I did not a splode like before. I have a 75 dollar bill. I just made it. You can have it if you'll leave my cows alone.--Schizo Master 16:02, 9 March 2007 (UTC)

High general grue has Lord Fluffy's approval for not fucking up his recently-cleaned sweater. I could just throw up a forcefield or alter spacetime to avoid the blast, but this requires so much less effort. /me smiles upon High General Grue, bestows unique Anti-Eurg Armor. Molotovnight, what happens when you run out of ways to embellish your entries? --Lord Fluffy who rains fire from the heavens 18:47, 9 March 2007 (UTC)

Yes, the Anti Anti-Benson Bombs only harm Motolovnight, and anyone who hates BENSON, unless I spare them. Also, since you foiled the dollar plan (It was a bomb), Emmzee, I have to think something up. Also, who wants to blow the giant bomb? The explosion will rock!

Lt. High Gen. Grue The Few The Proud, The Marines Lord Fluffy would love to detonate the bomb. He likes large explosions. As long as they do not damage his clothing. Molotovnight, I suggest that you open a stable wormhole for your followers rather than using a helicopter; it saves money on fuel. How is that armor working for you, General? --Lord Fluffy who rains fire from the heavens 23:54, 9 March 2007 (UTC)

Good, and remember, your sweaters are safe. Now, lets watch as we blow up Motolovnight! High^General _Grue

Yes. Lets. /Lord Fluffy chuckles evilly, deep in the throat... --Lord Fluffy who rains fire from the heavens 00:02, 10 March 2007 (UTC)

Good news, Mr. Terrorist!

I have just reported you to ban patrol for trolling and being ignorant. The admins shall smite you shortly. --General Insineratehymn 00:34, 10 March 2007 (UTC)

Well, I guess we can disarm the A.A.B.B, unless we can take it to the Uncyclopedia Salt Flats so Fluffy can blow it up.

P.S. If I caused any trouble, I am very sorry. Lt. High Gen. Grue The Few The Proud, The Marines

Can I Have That Dollar?

Now that his plot is foiled, and I din't a splode, will somebody give me a dollar for the bus? I got to go see my Mom. She's sick and all. Drink? Me? Never touch the stuff. Honest.--Schizo Master 00:39, 10 March 2007 (UTC)