Childish Repeating Game

EXAMPLE:

The Childish Repeating Game was invented...

Hey!

Stop it!

That's annoying!

You're gay!

I'm the coolest!

Ugh!

Fine!

I'm a stupid retard

At least you have the courage to admit it

Shut up

I'll set Philosopholis Thompson on you

Do you want a mushroom tattoo?

Right. That's it.

I will never watch Angela Anaconda again.

YAY! I get the TV! I can watch Atomic Betty!

That's for girls

You're a girl

Fuck Atomic Betty.

What with?

Forget I said Atomic Betty.

Origins[edit]

Okay, as I was saying, the childish repeating game has been around as long as there have been younger siblings. It was primarily designed to irritate and annoy the older sibling. The Bible alludes to the childish repeating game in numerous instances. The first family in the Bible, Adam and Eve's children Cain and Abel may have been the first to play the game. Indeed Biblical scholars speculate that Abel may have been the original inventor of the game. One day, on the windswept steppes east of Eden, Cain and Abel were sitting around, and as older brothers tend to do, Cain was looking for a way to ditch Abel. But as they were the only people around besides their parents, it is unclear what Cain planned to do once he had ditched Abel. Cain's annoyance with his younger brother only increased when Abel began repeating every word Cain said. Some scholars believe it was this annoyance may have led to the first murder, when Cain grew so frustrated that he slew Abel.

Later in the Book of Genesis, we see the story of Joseph and his eleven brothers. Of course, his younger brother Benjamin was a baby, and doesn't count, so let's say Joseph and his 10 older brothers. Joseph was Daddy's favourite, he got everything he wanted and was basically a spoiled annoying brat. He bragged to his brothers about his Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, and generally was a pest. One day Joseph was tagging along with his brothers and decided to play the most annoying little brother game, the childish repeating game! Joseph was seriously irritating, and continued echoing his brothers until they shoved him in a pit. The pit was deep, and Joseph couldn't get out. This would have been funny, and totally understandable had the ten not gone too far. In the area were a group of travelling slave traders, the brothers sold Joe to them.

The Rules of Play[edit]

The game is simple, the younger sibling simply repeats everything that the older sibling says, every groan, every cough, every laugh. Even if the older sibling insults the younger sibling, especially if he tries to use reverse psychology and insults himself. When the older sibling says the younger sibling's name in an insult, it is a breach of the rules to substitute with the older sibling's name. The repeating must be exact or the game is lost.

The game can end in a number of ways:

The Cain Method: The Older sibling gets so annoyed that he commits a violent act against his younger sibling. This method is not recommended however because the younger sibling invariably tells Mom.

Joseph's Brothers Method: This method involves relocation. While you can no longer sell your younger sibling into slavery, it is acceptable to have him inadvertently volunteer to do chores. This is accomplished by having him repeat his volunteering to your Mom.

Tongue Twister Method: This method is the least violent, and most socially acceptable way to end the game. It simply involves saying a tongue twister or a word your sibling can't pronounce.

Latin Quote Method: Similar to the Tongue Twister Method, but involving the use of a foreign language the younger sibling does not know. Latin expressions like "Post hoc, ergo propter hoc" are immediate show-stoppers for a younger sibling's Infantile Pride Parade.

The Gibberish Method: This method is the least physically violent but possibly the most mentally destructive way to end the game. It involves the player who is being repeated to say random words or a series of noises like clucking or the sound of a motorbike revving it's engine. This can confuse the sibling and make the sibling need many years of treatment to reverse the effects of the combination of words and chicken noises.

Telling Mom: This should really only be used by the unimaginative as a last resort. "Mom make him stop!" is really only for wussies and Laura Bush's son, William Shakespeare.

Silent Treatment: You don't say anything and wait for 5-20 min. then when the younger sibling says something you repeat it thus reversing the effect and annoying him.

Childish Repeating Game

Origins[edit]

The Rules of Play[edit]

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