Bricking

Hey kid, want to get high? Want girls to like you? Want to get rid of those pesky teeth while doing it? I have got just the thing for you! It's called bricking, and it's the talk of the town!

Words to be heeded.

What Exactly Is Bricking, Anyway?

Bricking is a recreational activity often presented as an alternative to drugs and alcohol abuse. It also happens to be vastly more painful. When combined with bridging or baby-throwing an extreme rush insues.

How to Brick

Bricking is relatively simplistic and can be performed by even the most primitive of humans. The process is as follows:

1. Locate a generously-sized brick (red is preferable)

2. Grip the brick tightly with both hands

3. Swing the brick up and into your face with as much force as possible

The mental and spiritual high achieved in anticipation of the pain brought on by the brick-to-face contact has been likened to a combination of LSD use and the eating of certain dried fruits.

Alternative Bricking Methods

Though the above bricking instructions are used all over the world, other methods have been developed.

The Culinary Method

1. Locate pan and pour water into it over a stove.

2. Let simmer for 45 minutes

3. Place brick into boiling water.

4. Smell it. It smells delicious.

5. Get a good running start, then dive head first into the searing hot brickwater.

The Brick Wall Method

1. Locate a brick wall

2. Slam your face into it

Why Brick?

Why not? All the cool kids are doing it!

Health Risks

Bricking is completely safe and hazard-free.

Cultural Effects

Bricking has been the inspiration for many artists of the 60s and beyond. Songs inspired by bricking include:

• "Another Bricking in the Wall" by Pink Floyd

• "Lucy in the Sky With Bricks" by The Beatles

• "Brickium" by Nirvana

• "Another Brick in the Eye" by WLCP