University of Guantanamo Bay

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Located on the South-Eastern tip of tropical Cuba lies one of the best kept secrets in post high school education. Established in 1898, the University of Guantanamo Bay has offered students a wide array of degree options, fun and exciting campus life, a quality athletics department and many opportunites for real world/life lessons.

Founded on all the fundamental principles guaranteed in the Constitution, UGB strives to not only educate their students in the ways of the sciences and the arts, but also to encourage public gatherings for the sharing of information. Due to this interpretation of their charter, the school has been branded as a haven for ultra-liberal communes and its students labeled as granola loving, tree hugging worshipers of civil liberties.

The beautiful and spectacular UGB campus.

Welcome to Campus[edit]

Recently remodeled in 2001, the campus has many visually stunning features, to say nothing of the weather which always seems rainy. Often students can be seen roaming the grounds, playing in the grass and holding hands and kissing under the trees.

As the university continues to grow expansion is inevitable, although you can be sure that when the time comes for expansion, all the residents and students will have a major role in all decisions.


Second year students enjoying an outdoor class.

UGB offers a wide variety of classes and degree options for prospective students. The award winning music program boasts a 97% graduation rate, the biology and mathematics departments rank in the top 2% nationally and the archeology and anthropology programs always contend for national scholastic honors.

Of course the school's bread and butter are its religion, political science and psychology departments which are routinely held up as the national gold standard. If you want the best education available about political and religious tolerance, Guantanamo Bay is the only choice for you.

Campus Life[edit]

To go along with it exemplary scholastic programs and finely manicured grounds, campus life lives up to all expectations of excellence. All students also have 24/7 access to one of the finest computer labs in the world.

Dorm Life[edit]

What parent wouldn't want their child living in luxury?.

Receiving a quality education is a primary reason that students flock to UGB and the university top brass understand this. Through careful observation and interviews both with students and R.A.'s from other schools prior to the construction of UGB back in the early 1890's, the engineers and architects wanted to create a unique dormitory experience for all the future students that would call UGB home.

To promote study, each student is given his or her own room. This helps cut down on interruptions and really allows the student the ability to focus on their studies. The rooms feature all the necessities of modern dorm life in the most convenient means possible. Every room is fitted with its very own toilet and dual tables, which allow students to set up a computer on one and still have room to study. All rooms have been retroactively fitted with all kinds of outlets to accommodate the wide variety of electronics a busy student will require. UGB creates the kind of environment any parent would be proud to send their child to live in.

Campus Dining[edit]

Students in the culinary program serving lunch.

During breaks between classes, students are encouraged to enter any one of five cafeterias located all across campus and enjoy the comforts of a home cooked meal. The staff at UGB know that comfort foods and healthy foods help stimulate the mind and make the students more comfortable. Doors to the cafeterias rarely close so students can enjoy a quality meal almost any time, day or night!

Certain times of each semester the students are in for a real treat as the culinary program on campus turns their students loose in the kitchens to prepare the food for the day! Usually eager to impress their instructors the culinary students are famous for holding nothing back with regard to menu and during these times the student body have been known to be treated to true delicacies like lobster thermador and filet mignon. Quality food is paramount at Guantanamo Bay.


UGB offers many outdoor recreation opportunities.

UGB is not all about hitting the books, a well rounded experience ensures a quality experience so the UGB board of trustees has made recreation opportunities on campus a top priority. All dorms have been fitted with a modern video arcade complete with racing, fighting and other games including pop-a-shot basketball machines, whack-a-mole machines and pinball. Every dorm also includes a television lounge and each is equipped with a 72 inch plasma screen television which is hooked up to a top of the line satellite service.

All across campus many athletic facilities provide students with a variety of physical activities. Basketball, pickle ball and tennis courts, multiple Olympic sized swimming pools, soccer, baseball and football fields and even hop scotch courts abound. Given the great weather, when students are not engrossed in studies it is not at all uncommon to see them outside enjoying campus life through recreation.

The UGB athletic department has also experienced many successful seasons throughout the decades. The golf team has been a national title contender many times and can boast Tiger Woods and Carrot Top as former members. The Women's stock car team is the current 5-time defending champions and the rodeo and wrestling teams have long been a trademark of the university.


UGB takes public safety seriously.

No look at any campus can be complete without looking at the safety of the students. All involved in the operation of UGB have created a model safety program that is quickly becoming the prototype for safety nationwide.

All students are never far from an armed and fully trained guard and the grounds themselves are constantly watched with a careful eye to ensure the students never have to worry about their safety. All residents, staff and faculty are issued identification that help ensure the safety of everyone, and nobody gets onto campus without one of these cards or an authorized guest pass. UGB is quick to boast a near flawless safety record since these new measures were put into place, and to the surprise of the administration, the residents welcomed them with open arms.

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This article was mentioned in The Guardian, further diminishing what little credibility the media had left. You can read all about it here