Remorse code
Remorse Code is similar to Morse Code except it conveys feelings of remorse using faces typed in rudimentary keyboards.
History[edit]
It is believed that Remorse Code was invented when the famous Roman, Finton Morse, the discoveror of Morse Code, Nick Cave, and the turnip, emailed his good friend Freddius Rown, having slept with his wife Julius Caesar on 15th March, 44BC.
Finton felt very guilty after having slept with Freddius's wife, who had been his trustworthy business partner before the Ides of March stabbing. Unbeknownst to both of them, the plan to kill Julius had been carried out due to their inability to foil a code about the plan. They emailed each other frequently using the Roman ScrollLock program about the intricacies of the code. However, Finton could not work on the code while he was racked with guilt, so he wrote an irrelevant email to Freddius attempting to confess his sins. This email was historically addressed "Morse :(" The email was so badly written that Freddius' puzzled reply came, "Morse, code?" When Finton replied, the phrase "RE: Morse :(, code?" was famously born.
Usage over time[edit]
The corruption of the term lead to what we see today. The frown face used in Finton's original subject line came to represent Morse's feelings at the time, thus giving us the word 'remorse' as a derivation from 'sad'.
The great computer uncovering of 1666 (after a small fire in London burned down some buildings, leaving only old stone computers and your mum's rockhard meatloaf undamaged) lead to the discovery of an old stone computer in which only "R M rse C de" was visible on the old screen. The term Remorse Code was inferred from this; connected with the famous Finton & Freddius story, the legend of Remorse Code meaning sad symbols was born from this.
Current usage[edit]
Possibly the worst result to come from Finton's Remorse Code invention was Emos, who famously like to communicate solely in the " :( " form of the code. Whether this is because they like tradition or because they are just whiney fucks, is still being debated in Parliament House.
Symbols in the code[edit]
This image is a message showing the most commonly used symbols in the Remorse code. This particular message reads: Are you serious? That makes me sad. So sad I'm crying, and angry too.