Open Windows

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Open Windows (abbreviated as OW) is an ongoing project released by AIM (Apple-IBM-Motarola) that anyone can edit. The catch is that Open Windows comes with absolutely nothing installed; all extensions must be downloaded from the Open Windows website (windo.ws).

Open Windows when first installed.

History[edit]

Open Windows was conceived of by Steve Jobs one day while on drugs. Inspired by awesome open-source projects such as StepMania and OpenOffice, Jobs wanted to help convert Windows users to the amazing functionality of OSX. We still can't figure out how open-source software can do this, but damnit if it won't stop most people from using it.

Popular Extensions[edit]

Some of the most popular extensions are based upon previous Microsoft creations but written completely from scratch and therefore bug-free (assuming that the programmer knows a compiler from his ass). More and more extensions are being created every day. Why not make your own?

Defag[edit]

Sometimes the files on your hard drive become totally gay and slow down your system's performance. To remedy this, a defagmentation program is needed, similar to Microsoft's file-arrangement utility.

Mineduster[edit]

Based upon the X-Lnux game Mensweeper. It features added levels for increased difficulty. The annual Minesweeper Championship is now forcing competitors to use Mineduster because of a mastery of the Expert level.

Messy Desk[edit]

Based upon Microsoft poop. Its most prominent feature is the ability to permanently disable the Office Assistant(Origglly developed by AIM.). If you choose to use it, you can browse through a plethora of entertaining characters such as Annoying Coworker, The Boss, and the crowd favorite Straight Up Gangsta.

Xbox 360 Emulator[edit]

Never fork out money to play a video game again. All you need is a keyboard, and you're all set to play your favorite Xbox poop$pee games, complete with full backwards compatibility. Joystick/gamepad functionality is not included.

Klondike[edit]

Based on Solitaire (Made by IBM in 2009 BC). Nothing is changed here besides the ability to use custom images for card backs.

Mozilla Firefox[edit]

It's not based upon anything created by Microsoft; it's just a kick-ass browser.

Steve vs. Steve[edit]

A game where you can pit Steve Balmer against Steve Jobs for who the biggest freak is!

Apple Authentic Advantage (AAA)[edit]

The alternative to Windows Genuine Advantage, it works by comparing several random numbers to those generated by Apples servers. In the event that a non-authentic copy is identified, all power is directed to the display adapter, which causes the monitor to explode.

Linux Emulator[edit]

Apple displaced this shit. Nobody uses it. Ever.