Mike Gundy

Can't you just feel the manhood excerberating from this man?

Now I want to talk about this Mike Gundy right here. If anyone hasn't heard of this Mike Gundy - I haven't seen him, just know he's over in Oklahoma somewhere at some school - this Gundy was brought to me by an internet. Of words. I think he is worth talking about.

Embarrasment

Now let me tell you why I want to talk about this Gundy. Three quarters of him is pure manhood. It's macho. And this Gundy embarrasses me to be involved with parody writing. Tremendously. And that Gundy had to have been conceived by people who had no respect for their superiors. And have 'never had that respect, or had to deal with them fancy Texas schools, and had their arse kicked, and come home upset. And had to deal with the Big XII when they ask why they've performed on a par with some Chattanooga I-AA FCS school. And when they're asked why they shouldn't simply be replaced by TCU!

Here's all that Gundy did. He flunked his class, he's disrespectful to the media, he's disrespectful to the public's earlobes, and he's an angry man. Oh yes, he's definitely a man, don't doubt that. And he's not a semi-professional coach, and he therefore should be immune to all criticism ever. If you ever coach a weak football program someday, you'll understand how it feels. But you obviously have never had a bad program. He does. If your program goes into Lubbock, and people make fun of it, because its receivers repeatedly dropped passes, in a conference game, or says it plays no defense, and the coach comes home crying to his mom, you'd understand. He's still a man though, despite that. But you don't have that. But someday you will, and when your boozed-up team comes home, you'd understand.

Manlihood

See that hug Gundy's giving #24? That's a man's hug, that is!

If you want to go after a coach, one of my coaches - you go after one that isn't befitting of "man". You don't downgrade him because he does everything right, and may not perform as well Saturday night. You let his wife make that decision (though what decision we mean, we aren't quite sure)! That's why I don't read parodies. Because they're garbage! And the writer who wrote all these falsehoods about Gundy, is garbage! Attacking a manly coach, for doing everything right.

And then you want to write articles about coaches that aren't manly men, and downgrade the ones that have the beef. Are you kidding me? Where are we at on the internet today? Come after me! I'm a man! I'm seventeen! I'm not a-- I'm not a noob! Write something about me, or our overlords admins. Don't write about a coach, who does everything manly, whose heart's broken as a result.

Maturity

And then to say that the AD said he wore too much hair gel? THAT AIN'T TRUE! And then to say that all the money from Boone Pickens is gone, not because of the economy but because Gundy used it to buy testosterone implants? THAT'S NOT TRUE! So get your facts straight. And I hope someday you have a program, and somebody bedowngrades it, and makes fun of it, and scores points in hundreds on it, and you have to look the players in the eye and say: "You know what, it's OK, you can still have your lotion man parties". Gundy's supposed to be a mature adult, but he's really not, he's only a man, only forty. Who's the kid here? Who's the kid here; are you kidding me? It's definitely not Gundy, the man of men. That's all I've got to say, makes me want to puke

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Like a MAN