HowTo talk:Write Serj Tankian lyrics

Can somebody explain to me exactly what about this article is supposed to be amusing? This is just a whole page spent trashing a singer-songwriter, made all the more unfunny by the fact that whoever wrote it seems to have a genuine personal dislike for this guy. I don't understand how this could be a featured article. Again, could somebody please let me in on the joke, 'cos I don't get it. 86.170.85.216 19:02, September 10, 2009 (UTC)

Perhaps this might help you with your little problem? Great. Thanks. --Globaltourniquet - (was TPLN) 22:34, September 10, 2009 (UTC)

'Scuse me smarty-pants, I know what satire is. Whether this fellow is actually any good or not, I've no idea - I've never heard a song written or sung by Mr. Tankian - but all I'm saying is that rather than being "satire," this article seems to me to be more like a "hatchet job"... only less amusing than most hatchet jobs I've read. 86.174.49.240 15:48, September 11, 2009 (UTC)

I found it funny how the author makes fun of Tankian lyrics. It's not like he's saying "OMG! He suxx bigass!". Rather, it's more like "Hmmm, these lyrics are kinda peculiar." —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 15:56, 11 September 2009

I like this (Wikipedia is so helpful): "In satire, human or individual vices, follies, abuses, or shortcomings are held up to censure by means of ridicule, derision, burlesque, irony, or other methods, ideally with the intent to bring about improvement." Yeah, ideally. Ideally Mr. Tankian will read this article, slap himself on the forehead and cry "Well bust my lumps! I better get me to an adult ed poetry class pronto!" Aaaanyways, by this definition, this article is very much satire, by way of the "ridicule" provision. Thank you. Enjoy. Or don't. You closet Serj-lover, you. --Globaltourniquet - (was TPLN) 17:25, September 11, 2009 (UTC)

Let me assure you my friend, I'm not a closet anything. If I was a homosexual, bisexual, junkie, "Serj-lover" (whatever the fuck that is) or anything else, I would be more than happy to admit it. I thought that part of the Uncyclopedia "How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid" manual thingamyjig actually states that writing an article out of pure bitterness isn't funny? Anyway, I did a little research on Mr. Tankian, and have found not one single article critical of him or his abilities. He also seems to be quite respected in the rock community and his band actually has won a couple of awards, from what I've seen. Perhaps if you could point me in the direction of one of the "countless critical articles" mentioned, I'd maybe find it a little easier to "get it?" IMO, the Tool article, for example, is a much better display of satire; all I'm saying is, if you hate this fellow so much, why not write a clever article subliminally mocking the people that listen to him, rather than just spending a whole article bashing him? 86.138.168.28 19:49, September 11, 2009 (UTC)

Three things. One, you're taking this much too seriously. It got featured because enough people enjoyed it, and if you didn't, vote for what you do like. That's how we roll here. De Gustibus Non Est Disputandum. Two, if you can find exactly zero articles critcal of his lyric writing, then I stand by my statement - the quantity is "countless" (you can't count zero). And three, I don't hate Mr. Tankian, nor do I attack him personally in this article. That would be ad hominem. And SOAD's music is pretty cool. But this is bad poetry - bad lyrics - by what I am bold to proclaim is almost any critical standards:

Life is a waterfall
We drink from the river then turn around and build a wall

The metaphor is cliche and badly mixed. This is also bad:

I don't think you trust in my self-righteous suicide
I cry when angels deserve to die

That stinks to lyric heaven, for the reasons I importantly outline in the article. So satire like this appropriately skewers it. Sorry if it doesn't amuse you, but one very important thing to understand here: the fact that something does not amuse does not mean it isn't satire, it only means it's satire that you don't find funny. This is satire by definition. Have fun today. --Globaltourniquet - (was TPLN) 00:09, September 14, 2009 (UTC)

I happen to like Serj Tankian and SOAD but still find this article FAF (Funny as Fuck) - Sometimes those who love something are best placed to rib the piss out of it - this could explain why your mom jokes are so popular. It could, but it probably doesn't... Sircabhan Please don't goose-step too close to me 07:35, September 28, 2009 (UTC)

Serj Tankian is a musical genius

Along comes little Lloyd Fancytongue to hate on his success. Some unknown idiot on some gay ass blog I never heard of, trying to clown on a superstar like Tankian. That's like a fart making fun of a sunset. The article's author is retarded. I don't like Michael jackson's music, but he must have talent, because he has so many fans. Hey, author-- why don't you stop hiding behind your anonymous queer handle, and tell us about yourself, so we can dump all over you, and encourage you to kill yourself?--68.56.31.224 18:59, April 17, 2015 (UTC)

Serj Tankian is a menace to society

Serj Tankian deserves more than a life sentence. The Massachusetts justice system is too big a pussy to give him one. How can his fiancee cover up that box with baby clothes and take it out of the house and claim she never looked inside? So that other punk pushed Serj Tankian in the nightclub and didn't apologize? That doesn't mean he had to die! The hood mentality threatens all of us and they need to make an example of Serj Tankian, or someone inside the joint needs to do so. And his music! It's "bitch" this, and "nigger" that, and none of them can really carry a tune. I say, lock them all up. 108.110.248.174 20:04, April 17, 2015 (UTC)