Forum:Dare to compare: Oscar Wilde vs. BENSON
LORD FLUFFY's father, a craven man who refused to post it himself, suggested that someone compare BENSON and Oscar Wilde. Do with it as you will, O ye mortals. Entertain me. --Lord Fluffy who rains fire from the heavens 16:14, 10 March 2007 (UTC)
I'll step up to bat:
| Oscar Wilde | BENSON |
| Is an important figure on Uncyclopedia. | Is an important figure on Uncyclopedia. |
| Wrote some stuff. | Wrote some stuff. |
| Has been to prison in a way. | Has been to prison in a way. |
| Sexual orientation cannot be questioned. | Sexual orientation cannot be questioned. |
| Entertains his followers. | Entertains his followers. |
| Widely quoted. | Widely quoted. |
Oscar Wilde: 6
BENSON: 6
Oh look, a tie! Surprising, given that Oscar Wilde is a famous classical writer. Note: some facts have been downplayed to allow BENSON to win this comparison. 
Alksub - VFH CM WA RV {talk} 17:50, 10 March 2007 (UTC)
Do not even consider comparing Oscar Wilde to Benson.
| Oscar Wilde | BENSON |
| Is the true essence of Uncyclopedia. | Is a semi-important figure on Uncyclopedia. |
| Wrote some stuff that millions of people fucking worship. | Wrote some stuff, that was kind of okay, but honestly kind of sucked. |
| Has been to prison in a way. | Has been to prison in a way. |
| Sexual orientation: gay, but we're cool with that. It's 1998! | Sexual orientation: unknown. |
| Entertains his followers, numbering in greater quantity. | Entertains his followers. |
| Widely quoted. | Widely quoted, but in a less funny way. |
goshzillacorrespondence 01:07, 11 March 2007 (UTC)
Consider comparing Oscar Wilde to BENSON
| BENSON | Oscar Wilde |
| Inspired Sacred Text | Wrote Sacred Text |
| Commonly assumed trisexual. | Commonly assumed gay. |
| Owns a hammer. | Got hammered. |
| Hot and sexy. | Cool and dead. |
| Entertained by His followers. | Entertains His followers. |
| The Way the Truth and the Light. | A Drink, A Smoke and a Light. |
| Swore to be BENSON forever. | Swore indiscriminately forever. |
| God of Uncyclopedia. | Symbol of Uncyclopedia. |
| Canadian. | British. |
| Symbol of Indiscriminate Worship. | God of Indiscriminate Drinking. |
| Yes. | No. |
| No. | Yes. |
See? No comparison. --Schizo Master 02:01, 11 March 2007 (UTC)
Well maybe there is. They both appear to be gone.--Schizo Master 10:34, 11 March 2007 (UTC)
I did not want to do this, but...
| Oscar Wilde | BENSON |
| Is an important figure on a sub-forum of Uncyclopedia. | Is a god on Uncyclopedia. |
| Wrote some great novels. | Wrote some lame-ass shit. |
| Sexual orientation: gay, but we're cool with that. | Sexual orientation: unknown; probably virgin. |
| Entertains his followers. | Entertains his followers, numbering greatly less |
| Widely quoted. | Widely quoted by losers. |