Forum:Bobby meets the Milf Hunnies
The following story contains what some may feel to be sexually explicit/graphic material.
If
you are under the age of 18, Please refrain from reading further.
- It had been a dark and stormy night. Bobby woke to find the curtains slightly ajar, allowing the morning
light to filter through. He yawned, and a sudden realization struck his still-sleeping brain. "It's my
BIRTHDAY today!" He grinned from ear to ear. His mother peeked her head into the room and, seeing Bobby
awake, slinked quietly in, closing the door with a barely audible click. She walked quickly to Bobby's bed,
and sat hovering over him, her face only inches from his. His grin widened even more. He could smell her
sweet perfume, his favorite. She remembered.
"Are you my big boy today?" she asked. Her eyes slowly scanned down Bobby's body. "Oh my, yes. You ARE a big
boy now! And just what do you want to eat today?"
"Pie. Your cherry pie."
- Bobby's mom lifted his pajama top up, revealing his slightly rounded belly. She moaned slightly, and before
Bobby could even squeal in delight, she quickly dropped her head down. She proceeded to nibble on his flesh,
mere inches below his bellybutton. "I could just eat you up, right now."
- Bobby gasped, and immediately started giggling again. It was Bobby's favorite game, one that the two of them
had played countless times, mostly when his dad was away. Suddenly, a noise was heard from outside the room.
Both turned towards the door. Bobby's mom seemingly jumped to the bedroom door, opened it, and quickly left.
He continued to dress, and bounded to the kitchen.
- While he was eating breakfast, Bobby's mom started searching the cabinets. She noticed that she was almost
out of flour. "Can't make pie without flour", she mused to herself. She left the room, and returned with her
purse.
"Bobby. Can you do a big favor for mommy. I need you to go down to the store and buy some flour. Do you know
what kind mommy likes?"
- Bobby nodded. She gave him five dollars. "Don't take your bike. It's not far, and I don't want the flour to
accidentally get dropped." Bobby nodded again. This was the FIRST time mommy had ever asked him to go to the
store ALONE. He finished breakfast and ran out of the house. He grabbed at the handlebars of his blue bicycle
and started to mount it. He remembered what mommy had said, and reversed his actions. 'I'll just have to go
thru the park', that's the bestest shortcut'
- The park was alive with the sounds of birds squalking. Up ahead, he could see a woman just standing there.
He approached her, and waved hello. It was Connie, a neighbor from down the street. She beckoned him with her
finger, drawing him closer. She smiled, and looked down at Bobby.
"Hi there Bobby! Isn't it a beautiful day?"
- Bobby nodded. In his mind, it was a GREAT DAY. His BIRTHDAY. Connie looked around, first to the left, then
the right. "I don't..." She never completed the sentence. Connie shivered, and a strange look passed over her
face. She stared at Bobby, he eyes widened, almost doubling in size. She started to shake, as she fell over
Bobby, knocking him down, and pinning him to the grass. Bobby looked up, slightly alarmed. Connie was
gritting her teeth, and moaning. Her head whipped back and forth, as her hips gyrated and pulsed. Even her
hands flailed around aimlessly.
- Bobby was scared, and he squirmed his way out from under Connie. Just then, a man came by. "Run, boy. Run
and tell a grown-up that Connie is in the park, and she's having a fit. Hurry!" Bobby ran as fast as he
could, and finally entered the General Store. Amy was behind the counter, as usual. Bobby told her about
Connie, and the fit. Amy got on the phone, and called the authorities.
- Minutes later, a siren could be heard, getting closer. Amy looked out the window, and saw that the ambulance
was heading in the right direction. She sighed, and turned back to Johnny. He told her that he needed flour
for his mom. She retrieved the flour, took Bobby's money, and gave him change. Bobby started to leave.
"Wait, Bobby. I think you should get a reward for what you did." She walked around the counter, and bent down
in front of Bobby, her ample chest stretching the fabric of the T-shirt she wore. Bobby stared at her
breasts, half-revealed in the v-cut. She fumbled at his belt buckle for a second. Then straightened up.
Bobby's eyes looked down. IT WAS A MEDAL! A shiny gold medal hung on his belt, a five-pointed star JUST LIKE
a SHERIFF!
- Bobby returned home with the flour, and gave it to his mom. Later that night, he had his favorite supper,
sloppy-joe's. Dessert was cherry pie. Bobby went to bed, thinking 'BOY oh boy! This was the BESTEST DAY
EVER!' 
| Humour: | 8 | Uses misdirection effectively, one of my favorite tactics in humour. |
| Concept: | 6 | It's been done, but maybe not in this way. Not sure. |
| Prose and formatting: | 7 | Uses caps pretty well, but a bit of proofreading could be in order. |
| Images: | 5 | Five for NOTHING. Well, except the blinky neon sign, but that's boring. |
| Miscellaneous: | 8 | Sheriffs RULE, man. |
| Final Score: | 34 | Yeah, this could reach feature, if it was an article. |
| Reviewer: | Ж Kalir, Wandering Hippie Salesman 17:05, 14 December 2007 (UTC) | |
- LOL. I actually never intended it to be reviewed. It was just a fluff piece, not for serious consideration.
- LOL. I actually never intended it to be reviewed. It was just a fluff piece, not for serious consideration.
- How about the sequel '10 years later'. :P -
Admiral Enzo Aquarius-Dial the Gate 
17:26, 14 December 2007 (UTC)
- How about the sequel '10 years later'. :P -
i gotta say this was pretty good--J.R. "Bob" Dobbs 03:29, 15 December 2007 (UTC)