Forum:A Nigerian Dream Come True!

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You all may remember the article I wrote about Nigerian e-mail scams. At that point I had never actually received one. But on October 12, 2007 (heretofore known as The Best Day Ever), my inbox was met with one of the greatest of all e-mails. I present to you the very same e-mail in all its Nigerian glory. Enjoy. -- » Sir Savethemooses Grand Commanding Officer ... holla atcha boy» 16:10, 15 October 2007 (UTC)

Dear Sir,

I am John Nwosu a solicitor at law. I am the Personal Attorney to Mr. Daniel S.Arango, a National of your Country, who has lived in Nigeria for the past fifty years, and whom here in after shall be referred to as my client.

In April 1999, my client was involved in a fatal car accident along Lagos/shagamu express road.

All occupants of the vehicle unfortunately lost their lives; my client was one of them. I have contacted you to assist in repatriating most especially, the money left behind by my client before they get confiscated or declared unserviceable by the bank where this huge deposits were lodged.

Particularly,Eco Bank, Nigeria, where the deceased had an account valued at about $14.7 million dollars, his bank has issued me a notice to provide the Next of kin, or have the account confiscated.

I seek your consent to present you as the Next of kin of the deceased since you are foreigner same with him so that the proceeds of this account valued at $14.7 million dollars can be paid to you as my clients Next of Kin, and then we can share the amount on a mutual agreed percentage.

All legal documents to back up your claim as the deceased Next of Kin will be provided by me since I am his personal attorney, all I require is your honest cooperation to enable us sees this deal through.

I guarantee you that this transaction will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of the law

Indicate your interest by sending the below information:

1. Your full name and address.
2. Your telephone /mobile
3. Your Occupation

Please get in touch with me, for further correspondence.

Warmest Regards,

Mr.John Nwosu

Discussion

I especially love the 'National of your Country' part. ;) - Admiral Enzo Aquarius-Dial the Gate 16:13, 15 October 2007 (UTC)

Are you planning on scambaiting him ? That would be some nice unterview or unnews material. You have a resource pool of wacko's potato choppers and other general misfits to act as proxies, material suppliers and scenario writers. A scammer anyone can fuck over. --Vosnul 17:08, 15 October 2007 (UTC)

I think you should take this man at his word. It's very generous of him to offer you this substantial sum of money. I can't see why anyone would treat this valuable investment opportunity with mirth or cynicism, when it in fact deserves careful deliberation and action. Opportunities like this just don't come knocking every day, and if I were you, I would do whatever this attorney requires so as to acquire this sum of money. --Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 17:24, 15 October 2007 (UTC)

But he's not a nice Nigerian. Instead of giving the massive inheritance to the family of the deceased, like any honorable man would, he's trying to name Mooses as family and keep some of the cut for himself! He's stealing from his client! We must expose him for the bastard he is! Unsolicited conversation Extravagant beauty PEEING 17:27, 15 October 2007 (UTC)

Mooses is family. Mooses is all our family. For example, he claims to be my father. And I believe him, because he's a trustworthy guy. Right, dad? Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 17:28, 15 October 2007 (UTC)

That's right, son. Now go play with your... um... "friends"... who, uh... I did not pay to taunt you mercilessly. Heh. -- » Sir Savethemooses Grand Commanding Officer ... holla atcha boy» 21:49, 15 October 2007 (UTC)

Maybe we can go play "Spot the Prostitute Who Isn't an Undercover Cop" later tonight. You always seem to enjoy that game. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 03:00, 16 October 2007 (UTC)

Really? I heard he's lost three times already. Unsolicited conversation Extravagant beauty PEEING 03:41, 16 October 2007 (UTC)

Aren't you lucky... my Nigerian prince only wanted to marry me for my Canadian citizenship. --Carlb 18:33, 15 October 2007 (UTC)

<whisper>Just don't tell them that that's how we all got our Canadian citizenship. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 21:00, 15 October 2007 (UTC) </whisper>

/me slams down a Canadian dollar on the table. - Admiral Enzo Aquarius-Dial the Gate 04:03, 16 October 2007 (UTC)

/me slams down an American dollar and watches the two bills go at it. -- » Sir Savethemooses Grand Commanding Officer ... holla atcha boy» 04:05, 16 October 2007 (UTC)

Five Euros on the American! Unsolicited conversation Extravagant beauty PEEING 04:17, 16 October 2007 (UTC)

The Canadian dollar will kick ass. It's a friggin' coin, and it weighs almost half a kilogram. Also, it's got sharp edges and is filled with a dollar's worth of chocolate. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 04:27, 16 October 2007 (UTC)

well if the eagle is scissors (beak), and leaf is paper, then hammer and sickle must be rock. Unfortunately eagle wins this round--Finnius 04:36, 16 October 2007 (UTC)

Ahem, the loon is the deadliest herbivorous predator ever to appear on a coin. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 04:46, 16 October 2007 (UTC)

I want to know how the story ends. I hereby request UnBooks:My Nigerian Dream. • Spang • ☃ • talk • 04:14, 16 Oct 2007

I occasionally get them, and almost always write back something. A recent good one was from some lady that supposedly converted from moslem to christianity, but she kept saying 'allah'...also she said she didn't want to get too deep into my personal affairs, and then asks for bank info...yes, i know, its a dead email, but i'm easily amused, and a quick 1 paragraph can be whipped up in no time--Finnius 04:32, 16 October 2007 (UTC)

So that works out to what exactly?

xe.com live rates at 2007.10.16 06:04:51 UTC

14,700,000.00 NGN = 115,446.26 CAD

Nigeria Nairas -> Canada Dollars

1 NGN = 0.00785349 CAD and 1 CAD = 127.332 NGN

Looks like that won't even buy you a house in Don Mills. At Toronto housing prices, I'm not even sure that'd buy an outhouse.

Oh well, better luck next time. --66.102.80.223 06:08, 16 October 2007 (UTC)

Claims on shares

• I claim 1% of this amount, which should cover the expenses that are owed to me according to the books... the ones that were never written. --The Acceptable  Cainad  (Fnord) 17:29, 15 October 2007 (UTC)

Hallo

I'm George Agdgdgwngo from the Republic of Agdgdgwngo. A mutant fish seems to have robbed the Bank of England. Tell me your back account number and sort code and I will personally withdraw the moneys ensuring they are safe. -- Hindleyite Converse 20:26, 17 October 2007 (UTC)

Dear Mr Agdgdgwngo: I AM MUTANT FISH!! I COME EAT YOU NOW!!! GRAAAARGH!!!! Sincerely, Mutant Fish 23:33, 17 October 2007 (UTC)