Caravan

The self-balancing holiday caravan was the inspiration for the popular Segway scooter.

Caravans or travel trailers are used for towing on holiday trips without making the budget drag. However, they're regarded as humbugs and are items of destruction. Caravans are often targeted by car passionates, revheads and car lovers and driving lovers, assuming that they hate caravans.

For people who like caravans, it's okay but they have to be aware of those facts.

• Caravans take up one car length (therefore, taking up more space on roads).
• Caravans cause traffic jams (because of one car length used up by the caravan).
• Add weight (cars must be big and powerful to tow a caravan faultlessly. Otherwise, cars towing caravans can add strain to every component).
• They create more blind spots (Highly experienced drivers are recommended).
• Learner drivers are forbidden to tow caravans for good measures.

Comparisons to other vehicles

In comparison to cars:

• Caravans are more bulkier than cars
• Cars are more rigid even though they're more heavier
• Cars and caravans both need to be maintained
• Cars are more indestructible than caravans

In comparison to camper-vans:

• Campervans are car developed
• They are no bulkier than caravans
• Campervans don't need to tow caravans as they have all the amenities

OK, imagine you have a caravan, then you also have a car to tow it, a big powerful car, 2.5 diesel or similar, and when you are not towing your caravan - which is a huge percentage of the time - you are driving around in the big powerful car using fuel and emitting grotty stuff both in huge lumps.

Now, you have a motorhome, which has a big powerful engine, 2.5 diesel or more, and you drive your motorhome to its site, park up, and thats it for the holiday - if you have ever tried packing up a motorhome for a quick trip to the shops you know what "thats it" means! You walk or bus or cadge lifts from caravanners to get around, or you tow a car, to be towable the car has to be very small and light, a Smart car or Citroen C1, and small light cars do not use much fuel, do not emit huge lumps of earth eating stuff, and when you get home the van is parked up and you continue using the small car, because its too expensive to have a third vehicle and the drive is too small anyway. So get a motorhome and save the planet.

Crash behaviour

Although caravans were built to be strong, it proved weak in recent crash studies. Caravans are made out of plywood, aluminium and sometimes, fibreglass which are known to be light but not as strong as other materials so they crumple easier. However, caravans proved to be extra crumple zones for oncoming cars behind. The strongest part of the caravan is it's chassis.

In experimental crash tests, one crash test uses a Reliant Robin to crash at the back of the caravan. The Reliant Robin is a lightweight and compact car and when it collided to a caravan, the backside had almost completely crumpled. After the crash, the Relaint Robin didn't suffer any damages apart from some scratches.

A Hummer is then used. This car is much bigger and heavier than the Relaint Robin and not to mention that the ride height is even higher. When the Hummer meets the caravan, the Hummer nearly went through the caravan and like the Relaint Robin, the Hummer suffered almost no damage.

Both cars travelled at 64 km/h in the test.

In culture

An exploding caravan AKA caravandalism.

Trail of destruction in a caravan banger race.

The aftermath of the caravan.

• In Series 3 of Top Gear, Episode 5, the Mistral GT was dropped onto a Toyota Hilux and it

crumpled but the Hilux remained unharmed.

• In Series 2 of Top Gear, a Rocket Car burnt a caravan after burning a Nissan Sunny. Those two

are the things Richard Hammond hates.

• Brainiac, a british science abuse shows use caravans to perform dangerous experiments

particularly explosions.

• In another episode of Top Gear, the Caravan Speed World Record was set at 124.9 mph but then,

the kitchen window blew out. But then, James May decided to get rid of it. The caravan was hooked up to a crane and dropped it at a height of 90 metres (295 ft).

Other caravans

The Russians are working on micro-miniaturisation of the caravan, surely to smuggle thousands of caravans into the West for holiday mayhem.

Intelligent Russian caravans have created their own tea blend for centuries. A resulting recognition of this was awarded to Cara Van de Kamp, Head of the Caravan obsessive society's Russian division in 1989 in the form of their own mass-produced tea - Russian Caravan. Many tea-totalers claim the taste of the product reminds them of past caravan holidays.