UnNews talk:FACT CHECK: Birthday Card not as Accurate as Hoped

First, I hope this is not about an actual Irving family at 407 Butler Street; if so, change names and locations. If you know these people, tell me, and I will delete the article according to Uncyclopedia vanity policies.

I did a proper Sources thingy, and added a few categories, which are good. It's always a good idea to have a fair number of words in the article linked to other Uncyc articles, I'd say between 2 and 8 per paragraph.

This article is very, very wordy, in the sense that there are long, confusing sentences with lots of bad grammar. I can't really help in this area because I am not a writing instructor by any stretch of the imagination.

You'll notice I've also made a few minor changes, either in accordance with UnNews preferences or to make it look better to my eye. This is an inexact science, but I think I did a decent job of detailing some problems with this article. Do not give up or despair, however. If you get stuck with this, try something else. You'll probably get "it" eventually, and if you don't, I can make you a thrall of UnNews. Thanks for your efforts. Cheers! Rev. Zim (Talk) Get saved! 01:09, December 6, 2009 (UTC)

As for your first point, I actually did check that. While there is a Butler Street in Kingston, Pennsylvania, the street numbers do not go up to the 400's. The wordy, confusing sentences are intentional; I did it to mock the style of the Associated Press. Thanks for the help, though!--You know what the music means... Our time is up. 03:38, December 6, 2009 (UTC)