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Worldwide Forecast at a Glance:
- Things should improve in Africa and the Americas, but there'll be loud thunderstorms in the evening, about the volume of a Thin Lizzy concert.
- In India, no sun for at least a month or two, followed by a month or two of blazing sun every day.
- On any random coastline, expect it to be like Christmas, at some point you know you're going to have a tree in your house from a hurricane.
- And now, for your extended forecast: "Foooorrrcaaaasssstt".
- In summary, there's a 50-50 chance that this forecast will go wrong 90 percent of the time.
Special Weather Report:
Montreal: Someone left Niagara Falls running all night and accidently drained the Great Lakes.
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There is a 50/50 chance this forecast is wrong because nobody brought the "good stuff" to the office today.
