You seize Ned by the shoulder, and he jumps nervously.
> Read the fucker his rights
You tell him harassment's a federal crime in your most "investigative crime reporter" voice, never mind the fact that it comes out as a weak mumble which would be better suited to talking about groundhogs.
> Drag Ned to police station
Ned is starting to struggle.
> Tighten grip
"Hey Sydney, bruv, what do you think you're doing?"
You realise that you don't remember where the police station is.