Knock-knock-knock joke

How NOT to perform a knock knock knock joke.

A knock-knock-knock joke is a form of comedic expression whose appeal draws from the repetitious knocking on a door multiple times. The joke involves one person vocally simulating knocking on a door three times, and then patiently waiting for a reaction from his or her peers. The Knock Knock Knock Joke is often seen as the evolution of the knock-knock joke, and literary critic and joke analyst Harold Bloom has often compared the Knock Knock Knock Joke to "winning the lottery after just saving a group of orphans from a burning wreck."

History and origin

The history of the Knock Knock Knock joke can be traced back as far as ancient times. The earliest example of the joke can be found in the Bible, spoken by the Lord in Exodus 9:22-25:

Now the Lord said to Moses, "Knock Knock Knock," and Moses laughed, for it was good, and replied unto the Lord, "That was a good one."

The knock-knock-knock joke has been used throughout history as a form of comedic icebreaker. Immediately prior to former United States President Abraham Lincoln's famous Gettysburg Address, for example, Lincoln surprised the crowd by initiating a ground-shaking Knock Knock Knock Joke. People present at the address stated that the joke was a "real knee-slapper" and was "wholly unexpected."

More recently, the Knock Knock Knock joke was featured in former Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin's farewell address. Putin's final words in the speech were "Knock Knock Knock, bitch. It's my dick!" Although Putin's attempt to draw a parallel between himself and the popular world leader, Lincoln was apparant, many Russian citizens did not understand the reference. As a result, many viewers of the speech described this line as "tasteless" and commented that they "found it unnecessary for Putin to whip out his penis at the end of the speech."

Execution

A properly executed knock-knock-knock joke contains three stages: the initial knock, the follow up knock, and the final closing knock.

The first knock that must be performed is the initial knock. The initial knock establishes the joke as a joke of the knock knock variety. "[The initial knock] is essentially the catalyst of funny," stated Harold Bloom in his 2004 comedy study, I Like Big Knockers. "The initial knock informs a listener that they are about to have hilarity shoved into their faces and down their throats."

The initial knock establishes the base of the joke, but it does not differentiate between the joke being a Knock Knock Joke or the funnier Knock Knock Knock Joke. The follow up knock continues to play into this misconception, leading the listener to prepare a joyful "Who's there!" that he can exclaim once the follow up knock is completed.

However, at this moment the closing knock must be promptly executed to make the transition from a Knock Knock joke to a Knock Knock Knock joke. As Harold Bloom once again states in his study, this final knock is done to "fuck shit up" and will "bring down da roof."

At this point the Knock Knock Knock Joke has been faithfully executed. Any additional phrases added to the joke may detract from the comedy and make you look like a little bit of an asshole.

In popular culture

Although many entertainers have been wary of using a knock-knock-knock joke due to its intense comedic merit, some popular entertainers have employed its usage over time:

• In Chris Rock's famous Why I Don't Like Them Honkey Ass White People comedy routine, Rock changes the format of his act midway, integrating a Knock Knock Knock joke: "White people, they be knock knock knocking on a door, black people be knock knock knockin' on doors too."
• During his State of the Union Address in 2007, Former US President George W. Bush attempted to bring levity to the speech by adding in a Knock Knock Knock Joke. Unfortunately, he mistakenly said "Sock Sock Sock," leading many people to believe that he simply didn't get the joke. Of course, this may have been due to his heavy usage of narcotics.