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Today's featured article – Alexander IV Alexander the Great was an act that was hard to follow. His empire stretched from Greece to India and as far south as Egypt. For his only male heir — Alexander IV of Macedonia — it would prove impossible to follow. Hence his sobriquet Alexander the Not So Great. Alexander IV was a weak echo of his father, like Caesarion the son of Julius Caesar, Napoleon II heir of Napoleon I, and various Kennedys, Bushes, and Clintons of United States politics. Alexander IV arrived in this world a few months after the death of his father in 323 BC. His mother was the fiery Roxane from Bactria on the Persian frontier, a wild land of two-humped camels and savage inter-tribal wars. Roxane was a warrior princess who was disgusted that her father had her married off to some swarthy, Greek-speaking foreigner. So much did she loathe her spouse that she tried to murder him on their wedding night — at least according to Oliver Stone's film about the Macedonian bleached-blond beach bum. After that bumpy start, the couple managed to avoid killing each other, at least until they produced a male heir. (more...) Recently featured: Arthur Currie Star Trek Windows XP Archive Vote for featured articles Previously featured article – Arthur Currie General Sir Arthur William Currie, GCMB, KCB, KGB, was a Canadian Senior officer during World War I. A prolific commander of the Canadian Expeditionary Force, Currie is among the finest Western front commanders in the war and one of the greatest Canadian officers. However, he is more internationally renowned for his world-class embezzlement; also for his hyper-sensitivity regarding his public image. (more...) You can vote for your favorite articles to be featured. More of the best of Uncyclopedia Download article feed plugin for Google Desktop edit Selected anniversaries November 3: Thoughtcrime Day (Airstrip One), 3rd Bolognese (First Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster) 1008 BC - Obi-Wan Kenobi, father of Oscar Wilde, is born. The Force gets just a little bit more English. 1868 - Ulysses S. Grant is elected President of the United States of America in the wake of Union PWNING of the Confederacy. James Joyce begins his biography on Grant, Ulysses. 1903 - John Keats writes the famous poem Panama commemorating its proclamation of independence from Colombia. Van Halen buy the copyrights to this song 81 years later along with a few old Panama hats. 1913 - Earn more, pay more. Income taxes are birthed from the head of the Gorgon Margaret Thatcher. 1914 - The Party Revolution occurs in England, which is renamed Airstrip One by Big Brother. Let's thank Big Brother for increasing the chocolate rations to 30 grams! 1957 - Rioting breaks out in London as party faithfuls realize George Orwell was mocking Big Brother. Effigies of Orwell are burnt in the streets and the US Embassy is burnt in anticipation of both generations of George Bush. 1999 - The Inner Party is founded, but fails to reach power under the leadership of Big Brother Sada Walkington. 2004 - It was today, this time last year. And yesterday this time was tomorrow last year. And tomorrow this time was yesterday last year. Information will not be correct next year, unless this is a leap year. 2007 - Barack Obama goes forward in time one year to find that he is running for president, winning in the polls. This leads him to announcing his candidacy for President of the United States 2008 - George Bush realizes he's president right before election 2009 - Mahmoud Ahmadinejad finaly gets over the fact that he won't get to play with the big boys in the nuclear playground. 2010 - Big Brother finally eliminates the proles. 2015 - Apple cancels the release of the iTouch Kids. Archived Anniversaries	suggest Word of the day procrastination Try to use it in conversation. Knowledge is power. edit In the news US House tries controversial plan to solve problems before deadline Farage creates, wins crisis‎ (pictured) Burr and Hamilton to settle differences with a cage fight The King is dead Iranian trumps Trump Hegseth orders attack on the Moon Obama photographed with aliens Trump breaks the Mustache Mafia Hegseth orders drone attack on Santa Claus Trump renames Christmas Uncyclopedia implements funny ban Miley Cyrus lends her wrecking ball to Donald Trump Prince Andrew to go into permanent exile John Bolton is indicted Florida to use Cracker Barrels as immigration checkpoints More Current Events at UnNews News edit Did you know... ... that Wright-Patterson Air Force Base is home to a heavily guarded repository of bad puns? Do you care... ... that some believe the Earth is actually flat-chested and a clandestine multinational program is keeping it stuffed? Read More
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Writer and Noob of the Month GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia! Seriously, we love you. Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor. Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come! It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon! HEIL FROSTY! Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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