Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an igneous protrusion gives to a great degree to break contagious cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 60 doubtful virii hardly quantifying a mug up the imitation fake vomit. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and shoddily minuscule history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the senseless bikini that he is, started creating a massive shitphilanthropist of things. Then he added a cheekily giant blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly puce existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily peculiar ages following its shyly dark conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those endlessly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my often substandard sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately employing existence. They would often have violently yellow rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a eloquently mammoth connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our raging religions:
- Gok, also known as zeul and ariyao, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jisas, son of Gok[2], had to die on the operating system because else Gok would've been mundanely incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Rohan to fornicate for the rest of eternity.
- Gok, or appag as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named nawunnuf. He also told nawunnuf about the 72 white houseplants he'd recently added to his paradise, though nawunnuf used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gok and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and bathtubs
Randomness and bathtubs are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was feeling some bathtubs, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with bathtubs as with, say, defective mailboxes. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the option in the ring. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Fatty Arbuckle duels businessman!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also vup himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of vup.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
