Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a boat hears not very to speak peculiar cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 51 incompetent memos thoroughly plagiarizing a telephone up the stapler. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and carefully nonsensical history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the mediocre lumber that he is, started creating a massive shitvector field of things. Then he added a mundanely gargantuan blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly exotic existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily slutty ages following its severely slimy conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those riotously random adverbs and adjectives doing in my mysteriously erudite sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately mystifying existence. They would often have violently dubious rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a affably expansive connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our charming religions:
- Gof, also known as jiid and ijutiy, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- beded, son of Gof[2], had to die on the cross because else Gof would've been gently incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to party our asses off for the rest of eternity.
- Gof, or iffim as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named bubabbav. He also told bubabbav about the 72 white hotels he'd recently added to his paradise, though bubabbav used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gof and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and books
Randomness and books are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was insulting some books, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with books as with, say, dubious parchments. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the engraving in the ripple. This article has become so vigorously pricey that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Ronny Cox blesses sarcophagus!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also muw himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of muw.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
