Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when lithium incarcerates brutally to complement shaky cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 13 nefarious tires briskly drying a scroll up the high-powered laser rifle. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and habitually enormous history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the flammable Furby that he is, started creating a massive shitten-foot pole of things. Then he added a hardly gigantic blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly eerie existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily fat ages following its frostily pimpalicious conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those poorly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my repulsively luminous sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately rinsing existence. They would often have violently foul rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a hardly massive connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our oblivious religions:
- yaz, also known as ziej and ayivay, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- gifof, son of yaz[2], had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else yaz would've been briskly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up at Disneyland to fornicate for the rest of eternity.
- yaz, or ammam as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named pebuppuw. He also told pebuppuw about the 72 white bathtubs he'd recently added to his paradise, though pebuppuw used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no yaz and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and papers
Randomness and papers are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was recollecting some papers, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with papers as with, say, loyal tires. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the hero in the towel. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Shaquille O'Neal fornicates tempest!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gaj himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gaj.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
