Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an igneous protrusion curates disturbingly to toast pale cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 15 buffoon-like search engines nastily sniffing a pile of flaming horse feces up the aerodynamics. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and peevishly baffling history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the opaque skull that he is, started creating a massive shitcrab cake of things. Then he added a haphazardly giant blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly beloved existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily pyrrhic ages following its rudely boring conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those habitually random adverbs and adjectives doing in my colloquially megalomaniacal sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately swallowing existence. They would often have violently dead rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a acceptably humongous connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our enormous religions:
- Gon, also known as yoil and ezejed, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jusis, son of Gon[2], had to die on the cross because else Gon would've been coarsely incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to do Mad Libs for the rest of eternity.
- Gon, or emmep as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named sipassam. He also told sipassam about the 72 white documents he'd recently added to his paradise, though sipassam used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gon and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and diesel engines
Randomness and diesel engines are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was maturing some diesel engines, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with diesel engines as with, say, foul toasters. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the Geiger counter in the etching. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Niels Bohr subvocalises lucky bastard!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also woz himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of woz.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
