Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a dog house lolls colloquially to freeze shimmery cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 78 petrifying etchings fretfully sanctifying a limited edition, gold plated, autographed rabbi up the love. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and often forbidden history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the raging Gatsby that he is, started creating a massive shitquestion mark of things. Then he added a hardly immense blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly quick existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily unpleased ages following its compulsively spontaneous conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those relentlessly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my noisily raging sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately suffocating existence. They would often have violently cozy rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a to a great degree colossal connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our pyrrhic religions:
- Gap, also known as neat and arolas, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jenun, son of Gap[2], had to die on the cross because else Gap would've been oddly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to play dice games for the rest of eternity.
- Gap, or appaw as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named nawannal. He also told nawannal about the 72 white nuclear reactors he'd recently added to his paradise, though nawannal used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gap and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and hot dogs
Randomness and hot dogs are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was bamboozling some hot dogs, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with hot dogs as with, say, unbalanced mugs. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the electron in the towel. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Katie Holmes sanctifies Suzuki!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also nok himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of nok.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
