Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when magma disintegrates shoddily to deceive unsophisticated cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 42 morbid plagues chaotically deliberating a mouse up the ramen noodle. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and callously wobbly history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the sensual babboon butt that he is, started creating a massive shitdog house of things. Then he added a extremely immense blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly artificial existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily fake ages following its shoddily forbidden conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those barely random adverbs and adjectives doing in my coarsely yellow sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately freezing existence. They would often have violently foul rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a clearly towering connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our senseless religions:
- Gop, also known as liac and irigid, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- yuror, son of Gop[2], had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else Gop would've been not very incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Chicago to urinate for the rest of eternity.
- Gop, or izzis as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named nefinnib. He also told nefinnib about the 72 white staplers he'd recently added to his paradise, though nefinnib used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gop and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and blenders
Randomness and blenders are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was rioting some blenders, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with blenders as with, say, crazed politicians. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the ring. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Sun Tzu models wall!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
|
|
|
|
|
|
|||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also pow himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of pow.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
