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The Article Which Makes the Present Feature Today's featured article – Switzerland Switzerland is a mountainous region created in the early 13th century in order to contain gold and produce chocolate bars. From this point on, the insatiable Swiss desire for idyll building (idyllification) led to the creation of a nation remarkable for its efficient transport networks, orderly villages and synchronised repetitive yodelling. At the beginning of time, Switzerland was a small moon orbiting the Earth, populated entirely by cows, sheep, and shepherd dogs; it is now thought to be where those creatures came from in the first place and it was known as tobleronistan. Location of Switzerland, according to CNN. Due to continental drift, the country now lies south of Germany. After being sent down to Earth, having fallen behind on sky-high rent, Switzerland came to be located south of Germany, bordering France, Italy, Australia and Liechtenstein. Switzerland annexed Czechia in 1990 because the country got too cramped and stuff is cheaper in eastern Europe, although today most Swiss are known to have trillions of dollars in the bank. (more...) Recently featured: St. Pierre and Miquelon Minotaur The Witcher Archive Vote for featured articles Previously featured article – St. Pierre and Miquelon St. Pierre and Michelob (technically, the Territorial Collectivity of Saint Pierre et Michelob; French: Collectivité territoriale de Saint-Pierre-et-Michelob), is an archipelago of small islands off the coast of eastern Canada, the main islands being St. Pierre and Michelob, south of the Canadian province of Newfoundland and Labatt. The islands come within 10 km of Newfoundland. (more...) You can vote because of article of your taste which should become the feature. More being best of Uncyclopedia Download article feed plugin for Desktop of Google edit Designated commemoration day Where's my marble steps? January 2: Global Day of Shame and Regret (still not including Saudi Arabia), Season of Giving officially ends 0 - Nine months from now, Jesus is going to be born, or so the prophets say, not realizing that no such year exists and this would have Jesus born in September. The Libyan Sibyl grudgingly buys a calendar with kittens on it from the local bookstore. 213 - Cassius Dio first reports on the tribulations of the Germanic Alemanni tribe as they are being stomped on by the legions of Roman Emperor Caracalla "The Callous" after being extended the olive branch of peace. The tribe, later known as Swabians, would not forget and would become big fans of Rainbow, Black Sabbath and the band Dio. 1492 - Granada, the last Arab stronghold in Spain falls. Queen Isabella is now free to initiate Spanish Inquisition jokes. 1655 - The secret Yukon War takes place and ends on the same day after no one shows up. 1880 - Football is officially renamed soccer at Yale as a joke on Cambridge. A new aversion to America is born. 1933 - Adolf Hitler kills his grandmother and takes over as dictator of Germany. He explains that "she was a fucking Jew". All Christian churches give him absolution. 1945 - Hitler's bunker explodes under mysterious circumstances. His grandmother's ghost is a suspect. 1959 - Russia launches the Luna 1 satellite into space. Designed to crash into the Moon to determine the exact type of cheese it's made from, it misses, loops around and destroys a rocket about to launch at Baikonur Cosmodrome. 2003 - Some guy walks into his wasted buddy's room early in the morning to point out that the clock reads "01/02/03, 04:05:06." He is abruptly beaten with an old Sega Genesis controller, finally giving the C button a use. 2015 - Former fourteenth president and model train enthusiast Franklin Pierce rises from the dead to whine, bitch, and moan about no monument being erected for him for keeping the Union whole before "Buchanan fucked it up". Archived Anniversaries	suggest Word of day procrastination Try in order to use that in conversation. Knowledge is power. edit News Hegseth orders drone attack on Santa Claus (pictured) Trump renames Christmas Uncyclopedia implements funny ban Miley Cyrus lends her wrecking ball to Donald Trump Prince Andrew to go into permanent exile John Bolton is indicted Florida to use Cracker Barrels as immigration checkpoints Flying Dildos dominate the WNBA Epstein list emerges Miss England to Miss World: I'm out Qatar gifts Trump an airplane Popeye deported for gang-related tattoos DOGE calls on Uncyclopedia Weezer gets weird at Trump's inauguration Trump tees up new American empire Advice of necessity? Ask Cthulhu! Current events of UnNews news edit Did you knew... Ali sadaka ... if Mommy is willing to lie about a freaky old dude who sneaks into children's bedrooms in the middle of the night to eat your cookies and drink your milk, she'll no doubt be willing to deceive you about everything else? Do you worry... ... that cats only pretend not to like to swim? ... and that they like it even more while inside a burlap sack? Read Many
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